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So Why am I Single in St. Louis?

I've been asked this question countless of times and every time I never give the full answer... Hell I find a way to give a polite and politically correct answer, but you know what? I don't feel like sugarcoating it anymore....

I'm single because I'm not APPRECIATED... especially the way I FEEL I should be.... I know it sounds a little "whoa is me" and bandwagon-ish but I can only speak my truth....Just like men do things to show their love females do the same thing. I'm a realist and I understand how a man's mind works... A man needs to be that provider, protector, AND PURSUER!!!! If he's not all 3 then he's not taking you seriously... I stand on that belief hands down... If you don't call me on a regular basis to see how I'm doing... curious as to what's going on in my world your not interested and your number gets deleted out of my phone. I have no time to waste on a person who doesn't deserve my time....

I've had TOO MANY conversations with GOOD women that just get so frustrated with the men in their life b/c ratchets come a dime a dozen.... I've personally never had a man cheat on me but I understand my girls' situations... I know everyone's not perfect but men hold to much power in most instances.... I don't let it get that far to where a man could do in that that bad..I understand how a man's mind work... I will give only so much rope to hang yourself and then your number is deleted... I know my worth... If you don't show me you know it too then you're dismissed... Flat out... There are PLENTY OF OTHER FISH IN THE SEA that are patiently waiting... No bragging at all... Again I say "I SPEAK MY OWN TRUTH" ..I often use some of my girl's situations and my past ones to make myself stronger in my stance on why I'm single... AND will proudly profess it............... I currently date..... yes.... BUT FOR THE BENEFIT OF ME... no one else....

When I want to be bothered... that's just it... I'm bothered.... I don't feel the need to have to answer to any man about what I do, where I go... or who I hang with.... I come and go as I please and my life has been so much simpler and easier now that I have a different mindset....

I'm not looking for anything serious for the simple fact that men in 2009 exercise their right to date excessively... Why can't I.... In almost all aspects of my life I'm a human sponge... I soak up information that is valuable for me and my assent to greatness... why ignore this area... it makes no sense to me when some women ignore the benefits of being single just b/c they want some constant penis w/o being labeled a hoe.... I've heard so many women say shit like this it makes me sick... I'm not saying sex every man in the club but to get in a situation just b/c u want sex is ridiculous and I've known females like that... to need a man constantly and it really don't matter who he is characterwise is disgusting and embarrassing to me... If you're not sexing every man you hang with why not date a few ... Fuck that stereotype shit... I'm over it and I'm tired of having to worry about what other's think... You don't pay shit or take the classes or seek the major at Saint Louis University SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO..... you have no say on my character or shit I do... flat out....

But back to the main topic....

I'm single b/c I've learned the art that men have passed along to their sons and grandsons.... The true singleness mindest is a mothaf*&^^ to have.... And it's's so empowering and intoxicating all at the same time.... To be able to answer whomever whenever you feel like it and having no remorse on sending someone straight to voicemail is too invigorating. I see why men do it... Now I know some may read this and think that "Oh my gosh.... she is missing out on so much"... but guess what babes... I did the relationship thing... for 3 years... it was both wonderful and horrible... I know what it's like.... I prefer this path at this point in life ... No I'm not bitter... I love a support relationships... But in my own situation I am very content and happy in this state... it allows me to concentrate in on me and mine....

Now the people I tagged are just people I feel would appreciate this... Nothing more or less... I tagged no one that this note is personally directed towards.... just some thoughts...

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4 comments:

Taneya said...

Finally someone I can relate to! I've been accused of being too hard...too tough on guys. Not true at all. I love men. I just don't love them enough to hang around for the BS. I'm content within my own skin and I would love to find a man who compliments me and enhances my life on many levels. But until you guys step up your game and learn how to treat a lady, you will continue to serve the purpose I have intended for you :)

Derrick Keys said...

Aren't you, like, only 21 years old? Relax. Sheesh!

CJ/Jessica said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
C N J said...

I think sometimes women build a hard shell but for real that's how you've gotta be when you're single. As far as any relationship working, that sh!t's gotta go. Would you put up with a man who acted hard all the time ? No, you'd kick his @ss to the curb, quick! You can't expect to get something you're not giving in return.

I've been in a relationship for a little over two years and before that I was IMPOSSIBLE to settle down with. There was always something wrong with them. I couldn't see my future with them, they play around too much, wouldn't be a good father, too annoying/clingy. They didnt' last longer than a few months. I found every excuse in the book to not get too serious with someone.

Difference is, I've now found my friend. I've truly found my partner in life who I don't get tired of and enjoy spending my life with. Granted, sh!t happens so who knows what the future holds for us but I do know that we both feel like we've found our companion in eachother and it feels great. It aint easy now! But it's worth it.

At the time, I had just dealt with a 'no good', let's leave it at that. I was completely turned off of by men. I was on a hiatus, indefinitely. My boyfriend & I
kind of got together on a friendship tip and it progressed (QUICKLY) into our relationship. So don't keep your eyes shut too tightly.. you might be missing out.

There is hope though.. Now, I also can say that we do miss and love single life! We aint no fools.. it's great when you're not obligated to anyone/anything and can run the streets. Just if I had to (which I do)choose between the two.. I'd have to choose him and our relationship.

My philosophy is they [ men & women] are all the same. It's just a matter of which one you choose to settle down and really spend your life with and I think...
I've got my one. :)
^ DONT HATE ^