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(sneak preview: Tues, February 23rd @ 7pm, @ Ronnies 20 Cine)
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GoGetter93 said...

Jeremy Stewart -

A friend of mine stole some food from a convenient store, there was an off duty police officer in the store so he caught him. The police officer was black so instead of taking him in he proceeded to talk about him and how his mother was a hot ghetto mess for letting him leave the house in some blue jeans he cut into some shorts and a blue jean jacket he cut the sleeves off of.

Jen said...

my fav: a lady's son was accused of jipping a lady of drugs. she gave him $20, he didn't give her any drugs. she called the police. the mom was like "my son doesn't sell drugs. he goes to church, i don't go but he does." and then the police officer asked her if she sells drugs and she said "i don't sell drugs. i'm a prostitute." LOL

Waka Flocka Flame said...

"Locked my CEO up, Now it's back to coka -- Ninjas talkin shit bruh, hang him by a ropa --
Hit em with the choppa, Call that shit hot lava, Call me waka flocka!!!"


Joseph Stankiewicz was on medical leave from an auto parts store when he called the company's human resources director and left a message on her voice-mail system. He failed to disconnect his phone properly and the voice mail continued to record a drug deal that Stankiewicz was setting up.


A St. Louis man will take action after finding what he calls a racist remark on his receipt from Pizza Hut.

"At first I thought maybe this was some type of promotional," said Karl Mayberry. "This had to be the name of a pizza that I didn't know."

But it wasn't. The words Mayberry saw on his Pizza Hut order ticket did not describe the pizza at all. He believes they described him. Where his name should have been, there were two adjectives instead.

Jim Jankinz said...

One of my college roomates was arrested for filing a fake police report, lol. I had to go bail her ass out of the pokey... I asked what she did and she said she made up a story about getting hit by a car on her way to work because she was running late and didn't want to get fired... I jus smh then LOL'd...

Goober said...

I got chased by a green car w/ blue lights in the grill for like 3miles.... it was a flippin "Game Warden" trying to pull me over for rolling thru a stop sign! Oh Boy was he hot & bothered because if refused to pull over.

I drove right to the county jail house where one of my cop buddies was on duty and told him a maniac is trying to car jack me w/ some phony blue cop light, lol.... turns out he was official!

I turned beet red and as the game warden walked away cursing me under his breathe, my cop buddy laugh'd at me and told me to watch them stop signs!! said...

Top 10 best Cop Quotes:

10. "Yes, sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think it will help. Oh, did I mention that I am the shift supervisor?"

9. "Warning? You want a warning? O.K., I'm warning you not to do that again or I'll give you another ticket."

8. "The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or not: Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?"

7. "Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where you go to ride on rides, eat cotton candy, and step in monkey DOO."

6. "Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster oven "

5. "No, sir, we don't have quotas anymore. We used to have quotas, but now we're allowed to write as many tickets as we want."

4. "Just how big were those two beers?

3. "In God we trust, all others we run through NCIC (National Crime Information Center)."

2. "I'm glad to hear the Chief of Police is a good personal friend of yours at least you know someone who can post your bail."

1 "You didn't think we give pretty women tickets? You're right, we don't